It's Sunday morning. I have the whole house to clean, two loads of washing to be done and a big, black dog who needs to have a bath. So, what do I do? Grab a coffee and catch up on the news via the brilliant New Zealand Herald of course!
Cruising the Life Style pages, imagine my excitement when I find this article on the new New York shoe store so big it is going to have its own ZIP CODE! Hmmm......wonder if Fungus and I can afford to fly to the Big Apple for a week? Because, that is how long it will take me to get through this store!
Not only that, there was also this little ditty about the ultimate Shoe Diva, Imelda Marcos, and her infamous shoe museum. Can you believe I have not yet been there? Shame on you Shoe Diva. Read more about it here and believe me when I say there will be a blog about it soon. It is on my list of "MUST VISIT BEFORE I LEAVE THE PHILIPPINES" list.
Sunday, May 27, 2007
Sunday, May 20, 2007
Shoe opinion needed.....
I must admit, when I saw that major platforms and rounded toes were filling the runways, I thought it might be a passing fad. I used to own the most amazing black suede strappy platform wedge type shoes back in my university days. I actually think I took a student loan to pay for them!
So as ever the slave to fashion, I have a total of four platform shoes in my wardrobe:
pumps
slingbacks
slouch boots
ankle boots
However, because you can never have too many shoes, I am thinking of buying these:
They are bright, cheerful, excellent colour, funky......what do you think? Should the shoe diva purchase the cute yellow platform wedges?
So as ever the slave to fashion, I have a total of four platform shoes in my wardrobe:
pumps
slingbacks
slouch boots
ankle boots
However, because you can never have too many shoes, I am thinking of buying these:
They are bright, cheerful, excellent colour, funky......what do you think? Should the shoe diva purchase the cute yellow platform wedges?
Blog Retard
I am really, really impressed at how SuperKimbo and IntrepidFlame create these fantastic links in their blog posts. I think I have figured it out so here goes.
Want to see the latest 'Kate loves Topshop' collection. Check it out here!
If this doesn't work, I really am a blog retard.
Want to see the latest 'Kate loves Topshop' collection. Check it out here!
If this doesn't work, I really am a blog retard.
Teaching in Tondo
Some of you know that I am a teacher. Some of you think I am just an expat with too many shoes and too much time on her hands. Come August, after my illustrious year of sabbatical, I go back to the international classroom in Taiwan.
However, despite swearing off teaching FOREVER after leaving Malaysia, I discovered that the Australia New Zealand Association here in Manila was in need of volunteers to teach street children in the worst slum in this city - Tondo. After visiting with the children one day, I was hooked and volunteered my time to help some of the older students.
Many of my students do attend school. They always bathe before we have class. They are happy, cheerful and so enthusiastic to learn. All of this yet they live just above the poverty line every day of their lives. The difference with these students is that they really see education as a way of getting out of the poverty cycle and that is what inspires me to work with them every week.
My students range from ages 20 - 13. They want to improve their English so they have a better chance at jobs where good spoken English is a prerequisite. An example of this is getting work in a department store, grocery store or even their local Seven-Eleven. Many would love to be a barista in a coffee shop like Starbucks but for that, in the Philippines, you must be a college graduate!
Some days, like last week, only seven students may show up. Other days I will have twenty students in attendance. But despite numbers, I diligently plan something which will target their spoken English in the same way I would teach a class of privileged international students. I buy all the felt tip markers, pencils, pens, glue sticks, folders and paper that they will need. I spend hours cutting out things for interactive team work, I adapt activities to relate to the kinds of lives my students survive every day. That can be the hardest part for me sometimes and I have had lessons fall flat as I realise that my students have absolutely no idea what I am talking about.
Every day of lessons, we start with a recap of what we did last week. We go over new vocabulary we will encounter. We begin each lesson with a prayer as all my students are devout Roman Catholics who view religion as the cornerstone of their lives.
After we work, I always make sure I bring 'merienda' with me and then we share afternoon tea - drinks, biscuits, savoury snacks and fresh fruit. I always buy for about 40 students as some of the children who turn up usually only eat once a day and I like to think that they can take something home with them.
An amazing 'Sisters for Charity' orphanange are kind enough to let me use an area of their premises to teach the students - in that way, the children are safe. Given the reputation of Paroso and Tondo, it also means that I am safe too.
Following are some photos of my 'classroom', teaching technology, the students themselves and views just outside of the orphanage. Just for something a little different from shoes..........
However, despite swearing off teaching FOREVER after leaving Malaysia, I discovered that the Australia New Zealand Association here in Manila was in need of volunteers to teach street children in the worst slum in this city - Tondo. After visiting with the children one day, I was hooked and volunteered my time to help some of the older students.
Many of my students do attend school. They always bathe before we have class. They are happy, cheerful and so enthusiastic to learn. All of this yet they live just above the poverty line every day of their lives. The difference with these students is that they really see education as a way of getting out of the poverty cycle and that is what inspires me to work with them every week.
My students range from ages 20 - 13. They want to improve their English so they have a better chance at jobs where good spoken English is a prerequisite. An example of this is getting work in a department store, grocery store or even their local Seven-Eleven. Many would love to be a barista in a coffee shop like Starbucks but for that, in the Philippines, you must be a college graduate!
Some days, like last week, only seven students may show up. Other days I will have twenty students in attendance. But despite numbers, I diligently plan something which will target their spoken English in the same way I would teach a class of privileged international students. I buy all the felt tip markers, pencils, pens, glue sticks, folders and paper that they will need. I spend hours cutting out things for interactive team work, I adapt activities to relate to the kinds of lives my students survive every day. That can be the hardest part for me sometimes and I have had lessons fall flat as I realise that my students have absolutely no idea what I am talking about.
Every day of lessons, we start with a recap of what we did last week. We go over new vocabulary we will encounter. We begin each lesson with a prayer as all my students are devout Roman Catholics who view religion as the cornerstone of their lives.
After we work, I always make sure I bring 'merienda' with me and then we share afternoon tea - drinks, biscuits, savoury snacks and fresh fruit. I always buy for about 40 students as some of the children who turn up usually only eat once a day and I like to think that they can take something home with them.
An amazing 'Sisters for Charity' orphanange are kind enough to let me use an area of their premises to teach the students - in that way, the children are safe. Given the reputation of Paroso and Tondo, it also means that I am safe too.
Following are some photos of my 'classroom', teaching technology, the students themselves and views just outside of the orphanage. Just for something a little different from shoes..........
Tuesday, May 15, 2007
An excuse to buy more shoes.....
A number of my posts of late have been about touch rugby. I play a lot of it, I love it, we have fashionable uniforms and of course, it is another excuse to buy SHOES!
Here is my touch rugby collection:
Tried and true - Nike Turf shoes, perfect for the dry fields we play on during summer in the Philippines. Plus, an added bonus is that they are in white leather which is reminiscent of a certain Waisale Serevi.....
Black leather Nike cleats - perfect for playing in when there has been a bit of rain......or a lot of rain during the monsoon season. Cleats give you a lot more grip, less slip action when diving for a touch or a try. Plus, they look good.
My latest purchase (Monday) after a hedonistic drinking weekend with friends, lakeside in Tagaytay. Just happened to find the Nike Park outlet store at Santa Rosa and found these babies:
What can I say? Silver is the shoe colour of the season (according to my May edition of Glamour) and a true shoe diva needs to keep up with fashion, even when sweating it out on the rugby pitch.
Here is my touch rugby collection:
Tried and true - Nike Turf shoes, perfect for the dry fields we play on during summer in the Philippines. Plus, an added bonus is that they are in white leather which is reminiscent of a certain Waisale Serevi.....
Black leather Nike cleats - perfect for playing in when there has been a bit of rain......or a lot of rain during the monsoon season. Cleats give you a lot more grip, less slip action when diving for a touch or a try. Plus, they look good.
My latest purchase (Monday) after a hedonistic drinking weekend with friends, lakeside in Tagaytay. Just happened to find the Nike Park outlet store at Santa Rosa and found these babies:
What can I say? Silver is the shoe colour of the season (according to my May edition of Glamour) and a true shoe diva needs to keep up with fashion, even when sweating it out on the rugby pitch.
I have been meme-ed??
My good friend at Intrepid Flame tagged me for a meme (I still don't know what that means!) about music. He has great taste in music, I respect his taste and we agree on most hip-hop. So, I have agreed to do it and goes a little something like this:
1. Go to www.popculturemadness.com
2. Pick the year you turned 18.
3. Get yourself nostalgic over the 'Songs of the Year'.
4. Write something about how the song affected you.
5. Pass it on to five more friends.
As I was growing up in New Zealand, I don't remember some of these songs hitting our shores. NZ has its own excellent music scene so some of these were probably knocked off the Top 10 by good old Kiwi music. However, here goes:
December 8, 1990 - January 4, 1991: Because I Love You (The Postman Song) - Stevie B
LOVE STEVIE WONDER BUT AT THIS STAGE IN MY LIFE, HAD RESIGNED THIS TO A CLASSIFICATION KNOWN AS "MUM AND DAD MUSIC".
January 5 - January 18: Justify My Love - Madonna
AS A NEAR GROWN UP ABOUT TO MOVE INTO MY FIRST FLAT AND START UNI, WAS NOT REALLY INTO THE WHITE GIRL STUFF. TRYING TO FIND MY ROOTS MORE AND BEGAN EXPLORING MORE HIP HOP.
January 19 January 25: Love Will Never Do (Without You) - Janet Jackson
TURN IT UP!
January 26 - February 8: The First Time - Surface
LIKE MANY 18 YEAR OLD GIRLS, THIS WAS A LOVE SONG THAT YOU HAD TO LISTEN TO, DREAM FOR, LONG FOR......THANK GOODNESS I AM NO LONGER 18.
February 9 - February 22: Gonna Make You Sweat (Everybody Dance Now) - C&C Music Factory featuring Freedom Williams
RIGHT UP THERE WITH KID AND PLAY!
February 23 - March 8: All the Man That I Need - Whitney Houston
PREFERRED HER DANCE MUSIC. DID OWN THE ALBUM THOUGH. SHAME ON YOU SHOE DIVA.
March 9 - March 23: Someday - Mariah Carey
DEFINITELY LISTENED TO IT. WOULD NOT LISTEN TO IT NOW.
March 23 - March 29: One More Try - Timmy T.
WHAT? NOT SO SURE THIS WAS A HIT IN NEW ZEALAND.
March 30 - April 12: Coming out of the Dark - Gloria Estefan
NOT INTO IT.
April 13 - April 19: I've Been Thinking About You - Londonbeat
WHO?
April 20 - April 26: You're in Love - Wilson Phillips
HMMMMM. NOT REALLY SOMETHING MY MATES AND I LISTENED TO.
April 27 - May 10: Baby Baby - Amy Grant
DITTO.
May 11 - May 17: Joyride - Roxette
PLAYED IT IF IT WAS ON THE RADIO.
May 18 - May 24: I Like the Way (The Kissing Game) - Hi-Five
THANK YOU! I REMEMBER BUYING THE ALBUM THIS SONG IS ON AT REAL GROOVY RECORDS ON QUEEN STREET. ALONG WITH GOING TO GIGS BY THE SEMI-MC'S WHO PERFORMED MANY OF THEIR HITS, HI-FIVE WAS WELL UP THERE!
May 25 - June 7: I Don't Wanna Cry - Mariah Carey
I ADMIT IT, LOVED IT FOR A SHORT PERIOD OF TIME. WENT WELL WITH ONE OF THE MANY BROKEN HEARTS I NURSED IN MY 18 YEARS OF EXPERIENCE.
June 8 - June 14: More Than Words - Extreme
LOVED IT, LOVED IT, LOVED IT. SENT IT ON A MIX TAPE TO MY BOYFRIEND AT THE TIME WHO WAS STUDYING AT LINCOLN UNI IN CHRISTCHURCH. NOT SO INTO THE BOYS LONG LOCKS BUT LOVED THE ACOUSTIC VERSION OF THE SONG. SUE ME.
June 15 - July 19: Rush, Rush - Paula Abdul
NOT SO MUCH.
July 20 - July 26: Unbelievable - EMF
REMEMBER THE CONCERT - WAS MOST EXCELLENT. ALSO, WORE THE LONG SLEEVED TEE FROM THE CONCERT FOR A NUMBER OF WEEKS WHILE AT UNI.
July 27 - September 23: (Everything I Do) I Do It for You - Bryan Adams
LIKED THE SONG.
September 14 - September 20: The Promise of a New Day - Paula Abdul
NO. NO. NO.
September 21 - October 4: I Adore Mi Amor - Color Me Badd
NOT MY FAVOURITE SONG BUT PLAYED THE ALBUM CONSTANTLY. STILL HAVE IT. IN A RECENT GARAGE SALE, COULDN'T EVEN BEAR TO SELL IT. SENTIMENTAL IN MY OLD AGE.
October 5 - October 11: Good Vibrations - Marky Mark & the Funky Bunch featuring Loleatta Holloway
GOOD AT A PARTY ALONG THERE WITH C & C MUSIC FACTORY. WHAT WAS I THINKING?
October 12 - November 1: Emotions - Mariah Carey
I DIDN'T LIKE THIS MARIAH SONG AS MUCH AS I DID THE OTHERS.
November 2 - November 8: Romantic - Karyn White
AGAIN, WHO?
November 9 - November 22: Cream - Prince & the New Power Generation
COOL.
November 23 - November 29: When a Man Loves a Woman - Michael Bolton
AARRGGHH. NO, NO, COVER YOUR EARS!
November 30 - December 6: Set Adrift on Memory Bliss - PM Dawn
EXCELLENT. REMEMBER BLASTING THIS ON MY CAR TAPE DECK. I WAS WAY COOL BACK THEN IN MY FOUR DOOR.
December 7, 1991- January 24, 1992: Black Or White - Michael Jackson
OK.........WELL..............I LIKED THE VIDEO.
I actually turned 18 at the end of 1991 so was mainly 18 in 1992. But like a true teacher geek, thought I better follow the instructions or I might not get an A grade.
Here are my picks for what were my favourite songs for the time I was eighteen years of age:
Summertime - DJ JAZZY JEFF AND THE FRESH PRINCE
More than Words - EXTREME
OPP - NAUGHTY BY NATURE
Boys II Men - IT'S SO HARD TO SAY GOODBYE
Boys II Men - MOTOWHPHILLY
Luther Vandross - POWER OF LOVE
Salt'N'Pepa - LET'S TALK ABOUT SEX (could rap the whole song - achievement or what?)
LL Cool J - AROUND THE WAY GIRL
EMF - UNBELIEVEABLE
Jesus Jones - RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW
Let's not forget NZ music and my all-time favourites "The Exponents" - three concerts in my summer of being 18. Driving down to the Esplanade, two dollar pints and dancing your arse off!
In my defence as an 18 year old back in 1991, this was in fashion at that time and may explain my musical errors:
Man, do I feel old.....
1. Go to www.popculturemadness.com
2. Pick the year you turned 18.
3. Get yourself nostalgic over the 'Songs of the Year'.
4. Write something about how the song affected you.
5. Pass it on to five more friends.
As I was growing up in New Zealand, I don't remember some of these songs hitting our shores. NZ has its own excellent music scene so some of these were probably knocked off the Top 10 by good old Kiwi music. However, here goes:
December 8, 1990 - January 4, 1991: Because I Love You (The Postman Song) - Stevie B
LOVE STEVIE WONDER BUT AT THIS STAGE IN MY LIFE, HAD RESIGNED THIS TO A CLASSIFICATION KNOWN AS "MUM AND DAD MUSIC".
January 5 - January 18: Justify My Love - Madonna
AS A NEAR GROWN UP ABOUT TO MOVE INTO MY FIRST FLAT AND START UNI, WAS NOT REALLY INTO THE WHITE GIRL STUFF. TRYING TO FIND MY ROOTS MORE AND BEGAN EXPLORING MORE HIP HOP.
January 19 January 25: Love Will Never Do (Without You) - Janet Jackson
TURN IT UP!
January 26 - February 8: The First Time - Surface
LIKE MANY 18 YEAR OLD GIRLS, THIS WAS A LOVE SONG THAT YOU HAD TO LISTEN TO, DREAM FOR, LONG FOR......THANK GOODNESS I AM NO LONGER 18.
February 9 - February 22: Gonna Make You Sweat (Everybody Dance Now) - C&C Music Factory featuring Freedom Williams
RIGHT UP THERE WITH KID AND PLAY!
February 23 - March 8: All the Man That I Need - Whitney Houston
PREFERRED HER DANCE MUSIC. DID OWN THE ALBUM THOUGH. SHAME ON YOU SHOE DIVA.
March 9 - March 23: Someday - Mariah Carey
DEFINITELY LISTENED TO IT. WOULD NOT LISTEN TO IT NOW.
March 23 - March 29: One More Try - Timmy T.
WHAT? NOT SO SURE THIS WAS A HIT IN NEW ZEALAND.
March 30 - April 12: Coming out of the Dark - Gloria Estefan
NOT INTO IT.
April 13 - April 19: I've Been Thinking About You - Londonbeat
WHO?
April 20 - April 26: You're in Love - Wilson Phillips
HMMMMM. NOT REALLY SOMETHING MY MATES AND I LISTENED TO.
April 27 - May 10: Baby Baby - Amy Grant
DITTO.
May 11 - May 17: Joyride - Roxette
PLAYED IT IF IT WAS ON THE RADIO.
May 18 - May 24: I Like the Way (The Kissing Game) - Hi-Five
THANK YOU! I REMEMBER BUYING THE ALBUM THIS SONG IS ON AT REAL GROOVY RECORDS ON QUEEN STREET. ALONG WITH GOING TO GIGS BY THE SEMI-MC'S WHO PERFORMED MANY OF THEIR HITS, HI-FIVE WAS WELL UP THERE!
May 25 - June 7: I Don't Wanna Cry - Mariah Carey
I ADMIT IT, LOVED IT FOR A SHORT PERIOD OF TIME. WENT WELL WITH ONE OF THE MANY BROKEN HEARTS I NURSED IN MY 18 YEARS OF EXPERIENCE.
June 8 - June 14: More Than Words - Extreme
LOVED IT, LOVED IT, LOVED IT. SENT IT ON A MIX TAPE TO MY BOYFRIEND AT THE TIME WHO WAS STUDYING AT LINCOLN UNI IN CHRISTCHURCH. NOT SO INTO THE BOYS LONG LOCKS BUT LOVED THE ACOUSTIC VERSION OF THE SONG. SUE ME.
June 15 - July 19: Rush, Rush - Paula Abdul
NOT SO MUCH.
July 20 - July 26: Unbelievable - EMF
REMEMBER THE CONCERT - WAS MOST EXCELLENT. ALSO, WORE THE LONG SLEEVED TEE FROM THE CONCERT FOR A NUMBER OF WEEKS WHILE AT UNI.
July 27 - September 23: (Everything I Do) I Do It for You - Bryan Adams
LIKED THE SONG.
September 14 - September 20: The Promise of a New Day - Paula Abdul
NO. NO. NO.
September 21 - October 4: I Adore Mi Amor - Color Me Badd
NOT MY FAVOURITE SONG BUT PLAYED THE ALBUM CONSTANTLY. STILL HAVE IT. IN A RECENT GARAGE SALE, COULDN'T EVEN BEAR TO SELL IT. SENTIMENTAL IN MY OLD AGE.
October 5 - October 11: Good Vibrations - Marky Mark & the Funky Bunch featuring Loleatta Holloway
GOOD AT A PARTY ALONG THERE WITH C & C MUSIC FACTORY. WHAT WAS I THINKING?
October 12 - November 1: Emotions - Mariah Carey
I DIDN'T LIKE THIS MARIAH SONG AS MUCH AS I DID THE OTHERS.
November 2 - November 8: Romantic - Karyn White
AGAIN, WHO?
November 9 - November 22: Cream - Prince & the New Power Generation
COOL.
November 23 - November 29: When a Man Loves a Woman - Michael Bolton
AARRGGHH. NO, NO, COVER YOUR EARS!
November 30 - December 6: Set Adrift on Memory Bliss - PM Dawn
EXCELLENT. REMEMBER BLASTING THIS ON MY CAR TAPE DECK. I WAS WAY COOL BACK THEN IN MY FOUR DOOR.
December 7, 1991- January 24, 1992: Black Or White - Michael Jackson
OK.........WELL..............I LIKED THE VIDEO.
I actually turned 18 at the end of 1991 so was mainly 18 in 1992. But like a true teacher geek, thought I better follow the instructions or I might not get an A grade.
Here are my picks for what were my favourite songs for the time I was eighteen years of age:
Summertime - DJ JAZZY JEFF AND THE FRESH PRINCE
More than Words - EXTREME
OPP - NAUGHTY BY NATURE
Boys II Men - IT'S SO HARD TO SAY GOODBYE
Boys II Men - MOTOWHPHILLY
Luther Vandross - POWER OF LOVE
Salt'N'Pepa - LET'S TALK ABOUT SEX (could rap the whole song - achievement or what?)
LL Cool J - AROUND THE WAY GIRL
EMF - UNBELIEVEABLE
Jesus Jones - RIGHT HERE, RIGHT NOW
Let's not forget NZ music and my all-time favourites "The Exponents" - three concerts in my summer of being 18. Driving down to the Esplanade, two dollar pints and dancing your arse off!
In my defence as an 18 year old back in 1991, this was in fashion at that time and may explain my musical errors:
Man, do I feel old.....
Thursday, May 10, 2007
NZ Breeds them Beautiful.....
All I can say is.....why didn't we see anything like this in Pattaya?
He may be a Cantabrian but looking at those legs, I think we can forgive Dan Carter. Just this once.
He may be a Cantabrian but looking at those legs, I think we can forgive Dan Carter. Just this once.
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
What goes on tour.....
If you have ever been on a sports tour of any kind, there is the unwritten rule of "What goes on tour, stays on tour". As a committed member of the Nomads Bullettes, there is absolutely no way I am going to flout that rule in any way whatsoever.
I sit here today completely knackered. I have suffering from the worst bad hair day in history, there is still 40% proof tequila running through my veins, fish net stockings and filthy rugby kit litters the floor, yet I have the BIGGEST SMILE ON MY FACE!
We absolutely rocked Pattaya and the teams at the Pattaya 10's won't be forgetting us for a looooonnnngggg time. Walking Street will NEVER see the likes of it again (until, maybe, next year) and we took the pub crawl leaving few survivors.
All I can say is that the tour consisted of..........
A LITTLE BIT OF THIS:
A COUPLE OF THESE:
A HUGE AMOUNT OF THIS:
WAY TOO MUCH OF THIS:
AN EXTRAORDINARY AMOUNT OF THIS:
A VERY TIRING BUT AWESOME AMOUNT OF THIS:
ONE OF THESE:
BUT NOT ENOUGH OF THIS:
Game on Bullettes!
I sit here today completely knackered. I have suffering from the worst bad hair day in history, there is still 40% proof tequila running through my veins, fish net stockings and filthy rugby kit litters the floor, yet I have the BIGGEST SMILE ON MY FACE!
We absolutely rocked Pattaya and the teams at the Pattaya 10's won't be forgetting us for a looooonnnngggg time. Walking Street will NEVER see the likes of it again (until, maybe, next year) and we took the pub crawl leaving few survivors.
All I can say is that the tour consisted of..........
A LITTLE BIT OF THIS:
A COUPLE OF THESE:
A HUGE AMOUNT OF THIS:
WAY TOO MUCH OF THIS:
AN EXTRAORDINARY AMOUNT OF THIS:
A VERY TIRING BUT AWESOME AMOUNT OF THIS:
ONE OF THESE:
BUT NOT ENOUGH OF THIS:
Game on Bullettes!
DO YOU SPEAK-A-DA FASHION LINGO?
THIS WAS SENT TO ME FROM A DEAR KIWI FRIEND - STRAIGHT OFF THE PAGES OF THE MOST EXCELLENT NEW ZEALAND HERALD. IF YOU ARE ONE WHO MAKES CONSTANT FASHION FAUX PAS, YOU NEED TO READ ON..........
If you don't want to make a faux pas in front of the in-crowd, then we can help you become one of them.
If a friend told you she was wearing covert couture with fashion-forward pickle-stabbers and she felt this was a fierce look, but you didn't have a clue what she was ranting about, then you will want to read on.
For here's the Viva lexicon of fashion phrases. Some we stole, others we made up. All will be useful if you find yourself trapped in a circle of well-dressed men and women carrying It bags. Tear this out and take it with you. Then if someone loudly asks: "Do you speak-a da fashion?" you can reply with style and grace.
Aspirational
This is what high fashion is supposed to be. No, you're not supposed to wear the clothes you see in the glossy Italian magazines - at least, not with butterfly wings on while climbing a tree in high-heeled boots. You're just supposed to be inspired by, or aspire to, them. It's fashion as fantasy. This is also the best excuse ever invented by the fashion industry for the politically incorrect things they do. Use it: We don't want 14-year-old girls to develop anorexia. Surely they can tell the difference between reality and fantasy. This is high fashion. It's aspirational.
Bespoke
Something that's made especially for you. Note that there are big differences between bespoke and other similar terms. Bespoke is where it's made for you from scratch. Made-to-measure is when an existing garment or pattern is adjusted for you. A one-off describes garments of which only one exists. A limited edition describes a garment of which there are more than one but not so many the girl next door will also have one.
Use it: He wears a lovely made-to-measure suit. But his boss, who earns a lot more, wears a bespoke suit.
Black
As in "the new black". A lot of fashion-industry types wear black all the time because it's slimming, it's attractive and it's a hell of a lot easier to wear than most of the clothes they see on the runway. So when something becomes so widespread it rivals the popularity of the colour black, it is referred to as the new black.
Use it: Eco-consciousness is the new black.
Covert couture
The sorts of clothes that cost a lot of money but don't look like they once did. Only the smug owner knows the value and quality of such items.
Use it: Cashmere socks for $200. Mmmm, now that's truly covert couture.
Cutensils
Household objects or utensils that are designed to look cute. Italian design company Alessi are a particularly good example because they give many of their products personalities.
Use it: My bottle opener with the smiling face is such a cutensil.
Edgy
See fashion forward.
Fashion forward
Mildly irritating phrase used to describe something or someone at the forefront of a fashion trend. Usually they're doing something edgy or unexpected. Not to be confused with "on trend".
Use it: She's gone very fashion forward this season, hasn't she?
Fierce
A compliment, meaning you look aggressively attractive, sexy and cool, which has become popular after almost constant use by Tyra Banks on America's Next Top Model to describe the contestants she thinks have done well. Often used sarcastically backstage at fashion weeks.
Use it: Honey, that mini-dress looks fierce. So does your giant up-do.
Glamazon
Combination of the words glamour and Amazon that is now considered old-fashioned terminology for long-legged, well-paid supermodels who strode the 80s' runways.
Use it: Those high-cut togs make you look like such a glamazon.
Glamourista
A substitute for the much overused word "fashionista". A glamourista is someone who really knows their way around fashion and glamour.
Use it: Oh dear, look at her. With her Chanel bag and her Dior sunglasses she thinks she's such a glamourista.
Makeunder
Similar to a makeover, except rather than dolling oneself up, one opts for a simple, no-makeup, no-fuss look. This can be a positive or negative.
Use it: My mother used this pudding bowl and scissors to give my hair a makeunder.
On trend
Another irritating phrase meaning that the person, label or item is doing exactly what you expected in terms of fashion trends. So if lace dresses are popular, they are making or wearing lace dresses. You may wonder why we keep using such phrases if we realise some of them are so annoying. Well, you try coming up with 20 synonyms for fashionable and you'll understand.
Use it: There were some weird bits, but mostly her whole collection was so on trend.
Personalisation
A big trend a couple of years ago when people who couldn't sew, knit or draw, took to embroidering, knitting and drawing on their own clothes. This was to set themselves apart from the fashion crowd. Personalisation is still a trendy thing but now it tends to be left to the professionals.
Use it: Hand me the glue-gun and those little blue beads. I'm going to personalise my T-shirt.
Pickle-stabber
An extremely pointy high heel that is, in fact, so pointy you could stab a pickle with it, if you so desired. Despite the awesome name, these have been replaced by wedges and platform soles as the shoe of the moment.
Use it: Pickle-stabbers and pointy toes are so 20th century.
Retro-futurism
A trend with a lot of currency right now. It means that something has a sort of futuristic look, but it's the kind of future that was imagined in the 50s and 60s, as in The Jetsons.
Use it: That shiny, silver bag is so retro. But, oh, it's kind of futuristic and space-age as well. Wow, that must be the retro-futurism I've been hearing all about.
Sex
As in "better than". An item of clothing or an accessory that makes the bearer so ecstatic that they describe said item as better than sex. Also known as a hero purchase.
Use it: These $2000 Balenciaga boots I just paid off are better than sex.
T-shirtable
Describes any sort of situation, logo or slogan that would look good on a T-shirt.
Use it: Green is the new black. Get me my pen. That's T-shirtable.
Trashic
Combination of the words tragic and trashy. A description that's so bad that its almost a compliment.
Use it: Oh Britney, shaving your hair off like that was so trashic.
Trickle-up trend
When a fashion trend starts in an area other than fashion, usually at street level - that is, art students and musicians are wearing or doing something and then the fashion industry catches on and presents the look on the runway, for sale.
Use it: New rave is going to trickle up just like garage rock did.
Up-do
Another way of saying your hair has been put up.
Use it: See fierce.
Vanity sizing
You know how with some brands a size 12 fits you perfectly, but in other brands you've suddenly become a size 14? This is not the result of rapid weight gain - it's actually vanity sizing, a clever marketing idea that works on the theory that if you feel thinner because you fit into a smaller size then you're more likely to buy.
Use it: You haven't lost weight, dear, that's just vanity sizing.
Vintage
You may think that you know what this means but if you've been listing the Esprit jumper you bought last winter on an internet auction as "vintage" then you do not. Last season's clothes are "used clothes". Vintage implies some kind of pedigree.
Use it: This exquisite 60s shift dress is vintage. That blue Esprit jumper you bought three months ago is not.
You
As in "that's so". Ambiguous phrase depending on how you feel about the person. Telling someone whose style you like, "It's so you" is a compliment. If you don't like their outfit, it means, "I wouldn't wear that if you paid me." If this is too obvious an insult, you could say "unclassifiable" or "unique".
Use it: Those three-quarter-length pants worn with green Crocs are just so you/unique.
* * *
NEED MORE?
Negatives
So done, so over, so last season, so last century, so common, matchy-matchy, passe, faux pas, very (insert dreary designer name), boring, seen-before.
Positives
Now, fresh, chic, love it, to die for, raising the bar, important, must-have, very (insert fabulous designer name), fabulous,
If you don't want to make a faux pas in front of the in-crowd, then we can help you become one of them.
If a friend told you she was wearing covert couture with fashion-forward pickle-stabbers and she felt this was a fierce look, but you didn't have a clue what she was ranting about, then you will want to read on.
For here's the Viva lexicon of fashion phrases. Some we stole, others we made up. All will be useful if you find yourself trapped in a circle of well-dressed men and women carrying It bags. Tear this out and take it with you. Then if someone loudly asks: "Do you speak-a da fashion?" you can reply with style and grace.
Aspirational
This is what high fashion is supposed to be. No, you're not supposed to wear the clothes you see in the glossy Italian magazines - at least, not with butterfly wings on while climbing a tree in high-heeled boots. You're just supposed to be inspired by, or aspire to, them. It's fashion as fantasy. This is also the best excuse ever invented by the fashion industry for the politically incorrect things they do. Use it: We don't want 14-year-old girls to develop anorexia. Surely they can tell the difference between reality and fantasy. This is high fashion. It's aspirational.
Bespoke
Something that's made especially for you. Note that there are big differences between bespoke and other similar terms. Bespoke is where it's made for you from scratch. Made-to-measure is when an existing garment or pattern is adjusted for you. A one-off describes garments of which only one exists. A limited edition describes a garment of which there are more than one but not so many the girl next door will also have one.
Use it: He wears a lovely made-to-measure suit. But his boss, who earns a lot more, wears a bespoke suit.
Black
As in "the new black". A lot of fashion-industry types wear black all the time because it's slimming, it's attractive and it's a hell of a lot easier to wear than most of the clothes they see on the runway. So when something becomes so widespread it rivals the popularity of the colour black, it is referred to as the new black.
Use it: Eco-consciousness is the new black.
Covert couture
The sorts of clothes that cost a lot of money but don't look like they once did. Only the smug owner knows the value and quality of such items.
Use it: Cashmere socks for $200. Mmmm, now that's truly covert couture.
Cutensils
Household objects or utensils that are designed to look cute. Italian design company Alessi are a particularly good example because they give many of their products personalities.
Use it: My bottle opener with the smiling face is such a cutensil.
Edgy
See fashion forward.
Fashion forward
Mildly irritating phrase used to describe something or someone at the forefront of a fashion trend. Usually they're doing something edgy or unexpected. Not to be confused with "on trend".
Use it: She's gone very fashion forward this season, hasn't she?
Fierce
A compliment, meaning you look aggressively attractive, sexy and cool, which has become popular after almost constant use by Tyra Banks on America's Next Top Model to describe the contestants she thinks have done well. Often used sarcastically backstage at fashion weeks.
Use it: Honey, that mini-dress looks fierce. So does your giant up-do.
Glamazon
Combination of the words glamour and Amazon that is now considered old-fashioned terminology for long-legged, well-paid supermodels who strode the 80s' runways.
Use it: Those high-cut togs make you look like such a glamazon.
Glamourista
A substitute for the much overused word "fashionista". A glamourista is someone who really knows their way around fashion and glamour.
Use it: Oh dear, look at her. With her Chanel bag and her Dior sunglasses she thinks she's such a glamourista.
Makeunder
Similar to a makeover, except rather than dolling oneself up, one opts for a simple, no-makeup, no-fuss look. This can be a positive or negative.
Use it: My mother used this pudding bowl and scissors to give my hair a makeunder.
On trend
Another irritating phrase meaning that the person, label or item is doing exactly what you expected in terms of fashion trends. So if lace dresses are popular, they are making or wearing lace dresses. You may wonder why we keep using such phrases if we realise some of them are so annoying. Well, you try coming up with 20 synonyms for fashionable and you'll understand.
Use it: There were some weird bits, but mostly her whole collection was so on trend.
Personalisation
A big trend a couple of years ago when people who couldn't sew, knit or draw, took to embroidering, knitting and drawing on their own clothes. This was to set themselves apart from the fashion crowd. Personalisation is still a trendy thing but now it tends to be left to the professionals.
Use it: Hand me the glue-gun and those little blue beads. I'm going to personalise my T-shirt.
Pickle-stabber
An extremely pointy high heel that is, in fact, so pointy you could stab a pickle with it, if you so desired. Despite the awesome name, these have been replaced by wedges and platform soles as the shoe of the moment.
Use it: Pickle-stabbers and pointy toes are so 20th century.
Retro-futurism
A trend with a lot of currency right now. It means that something has a sort of futuristic look, but it's the kind of future that was imagined in the 50s and 60s, as in The Jetsons.
Use it: That shiny, silver bag is so retro. But, oh, it's kind of futuristic and space-age as well. Wow, that must be the retro-futurism I've been hearing all about.
Sex
As in "better than". An item of clothing or an accessory that makes the bearer so ecstatic that they describe said item as better than sex. Also known as a hero purchase.
Use it: These $2000 Balenciaga boots I just paid off are better than sex.
T-shirtable
Describes any sort of situation, logo or slogan that would look good on a T-shirt.
Use it: Green is the new black. Get me my pen. That's T-shirtable.
Trashic
Combination of the words tragic and trashy. A description that's so bad that its almost a compliment.
Use it: Oh Britney, shaving your hair off like that was so trashic.
Trickle-up trend
When a fashion trend starts in an area other than fashion, usually at street level - that is, art students and musicians are wearing or doing something and then the fashion industry catches on and presents the look on the runway, for sale.
Use it: New rave is going to trickle up just like garage rock did.
Up-do
Another way of saying your hair has been put up.
Use it: See fierce.
Vanity sizing
You know how with some brands a size 12 fits you perfectly, but in other brands you've suddenly become a size 14? This is not the result of rapid weight gain - it's actually vanity sizing, a clever marketing idea that works on the theory that if you feel thinner because you fit into a smaller size then you're more likely to buy.
Use it: You haven't lost weight, dear, that's just vanity sizing.
Vintage
You may think that you know what this means but if you've been listing the Esprit jumper you bought last winter on an internet auction as "vintage" then you do not. Last season's clothes are "used clothes". Vintage implies some kind of pedigree.
Use it: This exquisite 60s shift dress is vintage. That blue Esprit jumper you bought three months ago is not.
You
As in "that's so". Ambiguous phrase depending on how you feel about the person. Telling someone whose style you like, "It's so you" is a compliment. If you don't like their outfit, it means, "I wouldn't wear that if you paid me." If this is too obvious an insult, you could say "unclassifiable" or "unique".
Use it: Those three-quarter-length pants worn with green Crocs are just so you/unique.
* * *
NEED MORE?
Negatives
So done, so over, so last season, so last century, so common, matchy-matchy, passe, faux pas, very (insert dreary designer name), boring, seen-before.
Positives
Now, fresh, chic, love it, to die for, raising the bar, important, must-have, very (insert fabulous designer name), fabulous,
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